{"id":3171,"date":"2015-02-16T12:26:23","date_gmt":"2015-02-16T11:26:23","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/rockyourenglish.com\/?p=3171"},"modified":"2015-02-16T12:26:23","modified_gmt":"2015-02-16T11:26:23","slug":"make-day-oh","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/buffiduberman.com\/nl\/make-day-oh\/","title":{"rendered":"Make my day. And yours. (Oh, and theirs.)"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>\u201c<em>I have no idea why he reacted that way<\/em>.\u00a0<em>He seemed really upset! \u201d<\/em><br \/>\n\u201cI\u2019m curious\u2026what did you say to him?\u201d<br \/>\n\u201c<em>You\u2019re wrong.\u201d\u00a0<\/em><br \/>\n\u201cOh. I see.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>*****<\/p>\n<p>This is a quote from one of my recent coaching sessions. The person I was working with was a Dutch executive. Which means, at times, she translated from Dutch to English when she was speaking English. And sometimes, it didn\u2019t work out in her favor. (This happened to be one of those times.)<\/p>\n<p>In Dutch, it\u2019s usually quite clear if the situation requires a formal or informal style of talking. The Dutch language (and the French, Spanish, and German, among others) has a formal and informal style actually\u00a0<em>built into<\/em>\u00a0their language. For example, there\u2019s a formal way to say \u2018you\u2019 and an informal way to say \u2018you\u2019. And there\u2019s an unwritten rule about when to use each one, and when to make the delicate transition from a formal to an informal communication style. I love that. We don\u2019t have that shizzle in English. We. Only. Have. You. (And without\u00a0<strong>you<\/strong>, sweetie, these newsletters would get so lonely!)<\/p>\n<p><strong>SAY WHAT?!?<\/strong><br \/>\nSo\u2026how do you express formality and informality in English? We use\u00a0<em>different words<\/em>. And we\u00a0<em>change the word order<\/em>, depending on who we are talking to and what we are talking about.<\/p>\n<p>Dutch people have a culture where the facts pretty much speak for themselves. \u201cZeg het maar\u201d and \u201cDoe mij maar een\u2026.\u201d is perfectly acceptable language to use in a cafe, for example. However, if you say \u201cTell me\u201d or \u201cJust give me\u2026\u201d in a cafe, you\u2019re asking for trouble. Oh, and don\u2019t say, \u201cJust do me.\u201d That means something\u00a0<em>completely different<\/em>. (Mail me if you don\u2019t know what that means.)<br \/>\nIn English we also negotiate differently than in some other cultures. We try to separate the person from his or her ideas. We disagree with the idea, but not with the individual expressing it. If you say that someone is wrong, it comes across as being quite harsh. That\u2019s what my client did, which explains why her English counterpart seemed a bit offended. We try to use \u2018softening\u2019 language to give bad news, or to express disagreement, and increase the formality when the situation gets more serious.<\/p>\n<p><strong>I CAN MAKE IT GO AWAY<\/strong><br \/>\nPlease don\u2019t let this happen to you. Please let this be the last time someone comes across as too direct when it\u2019s not appropriate. I can help you to never let this happen again! I\u2019m offering a\u00a0<strong>FREE WEBINAR on MARCH 3<sup>rd<\/sup><\/strong>\u00a0on\u00a0<strong>Agreeing, Disagreeing, and Giving Opinions in English<\/strong>. It\u2019s at 9 pm and you will get the recording afterwards. It\u2019s completely free and I promise it will give you new insights, vocabulary, and grammatical structures to help you feel more confident in English. You can sign up\u00a0<a href=\"http:\/\/www.businessenglishcommunication.com\/\" target=\"_blank\">HIER<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p>So, darling, now it\u2019s time to get control of your English. For free! Come join me in my interactive Webinar. It would make my day, knowing the chances of\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=2dUvpMyZi1Q\" target=\"_blank\">this happening<\/a>\u00a0will decrease. It will make your day, knowing that you can be more confident, professional, and appropriate when communicating in English, and it will make your network\u2019s day when they hear just how fabulous you are in English.<\/p>\n<p>What are you waiting for? I\u2019d love to work with you!\u00a0<a href=\"http:\/\/www.businessenglishcommunication.com\/\" target=\"_blank\">Klik hier<\/a>\u00a0and sign up!<\/p>\n<p>Hope to talk to you zoen!<\/p>\n<p>Wit lof from your English coach,<\/p>\n<p>Buffi<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>\u201cI have no idea why he reacted that way.\u00a0He seemed really upset! \u201d \u201cI\u2019m curious\u2026what did you say to him?\u201d \u201cYou\u2019re wrong.\u201d\u00a0 \u201cOh. I see.\u201d ***** This is a quote from one of my recent coaching sessions. The person I was working with was a Dutch executive. Which means, at times, she translated from Dutch [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":3172,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[7],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3171","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-blog"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.7 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Make my day. And yours. 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