{"id":3226,"date":"2015-06-15T09:23:23","date_gmt":"2015-06-15T07:23:23","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/rockyourenglish.com\/?p=3226"},"modified":"2015-06-15T09:23:23","modified_gmt":"2015-06-15T07:23:23","slug":"recipe-for-a-bad-news-sandwich","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/buffiduberman.com\/nl\/recipe-for-a-bad-news-sandwich\/","title":{"rendered":"Recipe for a bad news sandwich"},"content":{"rendered":"

Scene from my inbox:<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u201c<\/em><\/strong>Buffi, can you check this song we were working on?\u201d<\/em>
\n\u201cHi, thanks for your mail. I am coaching until late tonight and out tomorrow morning. However, I can check it for you tomorrow afternoon and give you feedback by the end of the day. Looking forward to hearing it!\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cBut I\u2019m recording it tomorrow morning!\u201d<\/em>
\n\u201cOh, ok. I\u2019ll see if I can check it tonight but it will be very late. I\u2019ll give you feedback as soon as I can. Thanks for your patience!\u201d<\/p>\n

Sweetie, what happened here? Let\u2019s take a closer look at this brief but important mail exchange. If you check how I responded, I served a\u00a0Bad News Sandwich,\u00a0<\/strong>fresh off the grill. This is something many Dutch people forget when giving \u2018bad news\u2019 to someone \u2013 the Bad News Sandwich! Say what?! (Oh, and it\u2019s calorie-free, by the way.)<\/p>\n

If you don\u2019t \u2018package\u2019 negative news in the appropriate way, you might come across as being too direct. The Dutch are well-known for their down-to-earth attitude, and their \u2018just say it like it is\u2019 approach when it comes to communication. However, English natives usually deliver bad news in a more polite way. We make a\u00a0Bad News Sandwich<\/strong>. And we serve it with a smile.
\nHere\u2019s the recipe for how you can make your own Bad News Sandwich:<\/p>\n

    \n
  1. Start off by saying something positive. Even if it\u2019s just \u2018Thanks for your mail.\u2019. That works well and starts out with a positive, welcoming note and is a \u2018warm\u2019 start to delivering bad news.<\/li>\n
  2. Say the bad news. Most people choose \u2018softening\u2019 language to start off with. This means starting the bad news with a phrase like \u2018Unfortunately\u2026\u2019 or \u2018Sorry, but\u2026\u2019, or \u2018I\u2019m afraid that\u2026.\u2019, etc. This means that you don\u2019t enjoy saying this bit of bad news. It gives your listener\/reader room for empathy. This is a very important part of communication!<\/li>\n
  3. You end with something positive. Something simple like \u2018I hope to hear from you soon\u2019 or \u2018Looking forward to your answer\u2019 or \u2018Thank you for your understanding in this matter\u2019 all work well when it comes to professional English.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    If you follow these 3 steps, you can see how communication will change. People will not feel as offended or upset that you\u2019ve said something negative in such a direct way, and it always keeps the door open to further communication. This is also an effective negotiating technique. My client could have used it right back at me, by making his own Bad News Sandwich. He could have said, \u2018Thank you for letting me know. I realize how busy you are, but if you could find time to have a quick listen, I would really appreciate it. I can\u2019t wait to hear your feedback!\u2019. This would have come across more \u2018friendly\u2019 than the statement used above.<\/p>\n

    So, dear, the next time you have to give bad news, serve up a sandwich! You\u2019ll see how communication will continue instead of breaking down. I so want that for you!<\/p>\n

    And if you\u2019d like more tips and tricks, especially when it comes to travel \u2013 changing a flight, making a complaint while still staying polite, etc \u2013 do sign up for my\u00a05 free podcasts<\/a>\u00a0which will be sent to you June 29th<\/sup>! You have nothing to lose \u2013 except maybe a few bad habits. \ud83d\ude42<\/p>\n

    I can\u2019t wait to get back into your inbox again next week! Until then, I\u2019m sending you a big Buffilove sandwich! Enjoy, and see you next week!<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    Scene from my inbox: \u201cBuffi, can you check this song we were working on?\u201d \u201cHi, thanks for your mail. I am coaching until late tonight and out tomorrow morning. However, I can check it for you tomorrow afternoon and give you feedback by the end of the day. Looking forward to hearing it!\u201d \u201cBut I\u2019m […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":3227,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[7],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3226","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-blog"],"yoast_head":"\nRecipe for a bad news sandwich - Buffi Duberman<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/buffiduberman.com\/nl\/recipe-for-a-bad-news-sandwich\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"nl_NL\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Recipe for a bad news sandwich - Buffi Duberman\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Scene from my inbox: \u201cBuffi, can you check this song we were working on?\u201d \u201cHi, thanks for your mail. 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