{"id":3716,"date":"2016-06-20T17:29:23","date_gmt":"2016-06-20T15:29:23","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.buffiduberman.com\/?p=3716"},"modified":"2016-06-20T17:29:23","modified_gmt":"2016-06-20T15:29:23","slug":"make-favorite-recipe-not-sound-like-jerk","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/buffiduberman.com\/nl\/make-favorite-recipe-not-sound-like-jerk\/","title":{"rendered":"How to make my favorite recipe (and not sound like a jerk)&#8230;.."},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Last week I was honored to give the closing talk at a Sprout event honoring young entrepreneurs. One of the topics in my talk seemed to cause a bit of a\u00a0<a href=\"http:\/\/idioms.thefreedictionary.com\/cause+a+stir\" target=\"_blank\">stir<\/a>. It was about my favorite recipe &#8211; the Bad News Broodje. Lots of people came and talked to me about it afterwards.<\/p>\n<p>You see, in English, when we have to give bad news, a very effective technique (but definitely not the only one) is to serve it up in a Bad News Sandwich. We use &#8216;softening&#8217; language to make the impact of the bad news a bit less dramatic.<\/p>\n<p>Here&#8217;s the recipe.<\/p>\n<p>You start by saying something positive.<br \/>\nThen you give the bad news, softened with words like &#8216;Sadly&#8217;&#8230;&#8217;Unfortunately&#8230;.&#8217;, or &#8216;I&#8217;m sorry, but&#8230;.&#8217;.<br \/>\nThen you end on a hopeful or positive note.<\/p>\n<p>That&#8217;s it.<\/p>\n<p>Here&#8217;s a Broodje in action. Let&#8217;s say you have to fire someone. That&#8217;s always hard. You can say &#8216;You&#8217;re fired.&#8217; Which makes you sound like an asshole (or Donald\u00a0<a href=\"http:\/\/trumpdonald.org\/\" target=\"_blank\">Trump<\/a>&#8230;oh, wait&#8230;same thing), and will make the person getting the news feel like a loser with a capital L stamped on their forehead. The message comes through loud and clear, but no one feels good about it.<\/p>\n<p>You can also serve it up real nice in a BNB, like this:<\/p>\n<p>&#8216;Thanks for coming in today. I&#8217;m sorry, but we are unable to renew your contract at this time. I&#8217;d like to thank you for all that you&#8217;ve done for our company.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>You started with thanking someone (even if the only nice thing you can think of is &#8216;Thank you for coming&#8217;. That&#8217;s still something and it does count in the Being Nice Olympics). After that, you packaged the bad news with &#8216;I&#8217;m sorry&#8217;. And it was served with a side salad of &#8216;at this time&#8217;. This means that there might be a chance that they could come back at a later time and try again. (However, if this is not the case, don&#8217;t try this at home, as False Hope Sucks.) You ended the dish with a nice slice of optimism, making this person feel appreciated and valued, even if they no longer have a job at your company.<\/p>\n<p>Many people were surprised at the impact a BNB could have. It really can make a big difference when the situation calls for it. As I said before, it&#8217;s not the only option, but can be a very effective (and professional!) one to use the next time you have to give bad news.<\/p>\n<p>Try it, and let me know how it goes!<\/p>\n<p>Thanks so much for reading this mail!<br \/>\nI&#8217;m terribly sorry, but I have to end it now.<br \/>\nBut I promise I&#8217;ll be back next week with some more Buffilove!<br \/>\n(And yes, I see what I did there.)<\/p>\n<p>Talk to you zoen!<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Last week I was honored to give the closing talk at a Sprout event honoring young entrepreneurs. One of the topics in my talk seemed to cause a bit of a\u00a0stir. It was about my favorite recipe &#8211; the Bad News Broodje. Lots of people came and talked to me about it afterwards. You see, [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":3717,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[7],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3716","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-blog"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.4 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>How to make my favorite recipe (and not sound like a jerk)..... - Buffi Duberman<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/buffiduberman.com\/nl\/make-favorite-recipe-not-sound-like-jerk\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"nl_NL\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"How to make my favorite recipe (and not sound like a jerk)..... - Buffi Duberman\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Last week I was honored to give the closing talk at a Sprout event honoring young entrepreneurs. 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